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April 13, 2023
Things Are Getting Hairy Around Here
By Mikie Baker
The Bandera Prophet
I have no idea why my mind keeps turning to hair, but here we go again. This week, it’s about that “lovely” gray hair on your head. That is if you’ve still got any.
I grew up with very curly hair which was the bane of my existence. All “cool” girls in school had straight hair, with bangs and a little pert flip at the end of their straight, golden tresses. Me? Crazy curls that I worked diligently to hide. Thank goodness for orange juice cans. Maybe what’s why I don’t drink OJ to this day.
Luckily, I outgrew the straight hair curse when I went to college and then the curls could be a crown of ringlet glory. The curls went wherever they wanted to, and I didn’t even own a brush. Times were good.
So, when a good friend of mine, who was spending the night one time, asked me where my mirror was so she could look at the back of her hair, I gave her a blank stare. I never once looked at the back of my hair. It was going to do what it was going to do. I never heard anyone utter, “Oh my! Look at the back of that woman’s head! Doesn’t she even have a Back of the Hair Mirror? Well God Bless Her and that crazy hair.”
Curly hair just doesn’t care.
Sadly, that dear friend who was always worried about the back of her head has passed away. Luckily, I was given some of her ashes in a small glass wine bottle (you got to have a sense of humor) and I keep that bottle on my vanity with the bottle facing the mirror so she can always check the back of her ashes. I know she’d appreciate the gesture.
The rest of us have turned into old ladies who, mostly, have given up on the $150 color job every six weeks and just admitted we were now gray. It was pretty hard for Very Best Friend, but she finally went to the Gray Side.
One day she chimed up and said, “Well, have you heard of Purple Shampoo yet? It makes your gray hair all shiny and pretty.”
There’s no such thing as good-looking gray hair, it only means you’re old, but I said nothing and, of course, went out and bought my own Purple Shampoo and Conditioner. I should have figured it out when the directions said, “Wash and leave this purple stuff in your hair for at least 5 minutes. Only use once a week, or you’ll be sorry.”
I didn’t see much difference, but the next time I saw VBF, her hair had a funny purplish hue that reminded me of the little old ladies at the hair salon where Dearly Demented Mom attended weekly. Sigh. We really are old, aren’t we? I threw my shampoo and conditioner in the trash.
I refuse to become an old lady that dyes her hair purple, fake red or just a streak of turquoise to add a hint of color. DDM would not approve because “it’s just not proper.”
It’s time to just enjoy all that thick hair I’ve had all these years and know that I’ll never have a bald spot in the back of my head. You know why? That would mean I’d need a mirror to check the back of my hair.
Ok, I’ve covered all the kinds of hair it’s proper to talk about in public so next week, I’ll just have to find something new to run up and down my hairy legs.
I grew up with very curly hair which was the bane of my existence. All “cool” girls in school had straight hair, with bangs and a little pert flip at the end of their straight, golden tresses. Me? Crazy curls that I worked diligently to hide. Thank goodness for orange juice cans. Maybe what’s why I don’t drink OJ to this day.
Luckily, I outgrew the straight hair curse when I went to college and then the curls could be a crown of ringlet glory. The curls went wherever they wanted to, and I didn’t even own a brush. Times were good.
So, when a good friend of mine, who was spending the night one time, asked me where my mirror was so she could look at the back of her hair, I gave her a blank stare. I never once looked at the back of my hair. It was going to do what it was going to do. I never heard anyone utter, “Oh my! Look at the back of that woman’s head! Doesn’t she even have a Back of the Hair Mirror? Well God Bless Her and that crazy hair.”
Curly hair just doesn’t care.
Sadly, that dear friend who was always worried about the back of her head has passed away. Luckily, I was given some of her ashes in a small glass wine bottle (you got to have a sense of humor) and I keep that bottle on my vanity with the bottle facing the mirror so she can always check the back of her ashes. I know she’d appreciate the gesture.
The rest of us have turned into old ladies who, mostly, have given up on the $150 color job every six weeks and just admitted we were now gray. It was pretty hard for Very Best Friend, but she finally went to the Gray Side.
One day she chimed up and said, “Well, have you heard of Purple Shampoo yet? It makes your gray hair all shiny and pretty.”
There’s no such thing as good-looking gray hair, it only means you’re old, but I said nothing and, of course, went out and bought my own Purple Shampoo and Conditioner. I should have figured it out when the directions said, “Wash and leave this purple stuff in your hair for at least 5 minutes. Only use once a week, or you’ll be sorry.”
I didn’t see much difference, but the next time I saw VBF, her hair had a funny purplish hue that reminded me of the little old ladies at the hair salon where Dearly Demented Mom attended weekly. Sigh. We really are old, aren’t we? I threw my shampoo and conditioner in the trash.
I refuse to become an old lady that dyes her hair purple, fake red or just a streak of turquoise to add a hint of color. DDM would not approve because “it’s just not proper.”
It’s time to just enjoy all that thick hair I’ve had all these years and know that I’ll never have a bald spot in the back of my head. You know why? That would mean I’d need a mirror to check the back of my hair.
Ok, I’ve covered all the kinds of hair it’s proper to talk about in public so next week, I’ll just have to find something new to run up and down my hairy legs.